befogged

This sprang from a forum discussion related to pride in one’s country, but I reckon it’s worth repeating.

Most people, I think, feel that there is a difference between loving one’s country and being proud of said country.

I love my country. I love the rolling hills, the history (by ‘history’ I mean ‘fascinating historical heritage’, incidentally. Not ‘I just love everything this country has ever done at any point in its history’!), the ancient sites, the beautiful-yet-unassuming flora and fauna, I even love the weather, gods help me (and I say this on a miserably soggy day in what’s supposed to be the middle of summer)! I love the people, by and large. It’s home, and I am very grateful that it is my home.

I don’t have such love for my government and for its actions, and nor do I have pride in same. The government is paid, by myself and my countrypeople, to do a job to the best of their ability, and I will consider their performance, and therefore the actions of ‘This Country’ on the world stage, and judge accordingly with my vote. There’s a difference between ‘my country the home’ and ‘my country the political power’.

My new job is (from my perspective at least!) going swimmingly - I am just as busy, but I am much more relaxed and happier about it all, as are all of my new (old?) colleagues. Plus my calendar is no longer half filled with meetings before I’ve even started the week - we just, well, talk to each other. The joys of a smaller company!

Since, as anticipated, it’s proved such a good fresh start I decided it would make sense if I try to consider it a new start in various other ways, too.

So, after years of not managing to get my hands on a Round Tuit I have actually joined a gym. And have so far been going sufficiently often to make that as cost-effective as it would be to go to the local leisure centre.  Well, okay, jogging outdoors would be cheaper, but since I’ve spent my entire adult life completely failing to do any such thing and any sort of at-home exercise has only ever been sporadic at best I might as well be realistic and consider the financial cost to be far offset by the health benefits.

Once I build up my fitness to a vaguely respectable degree (this may take some time! I have already lost several of the comfort-eating pounds I put on in my previous position, but my starting point on the fitness scale was probably a bit woeful for a 30 year old woman), there’s a pool and loads of classes, too, so I am hoping to pick up yoga again. What is it they say? Six weeks to make a habit, one to break it? Well, I’ll cross my fingers that I’m halfway to making a new one!

Which is just as well, as the gym contains showers, and thanks to a bit of an incident whereby the part of our kitchen ceiling that’s just below our shower decided that it would really prefer to sit on the floor ours is currently out of action. We do have a separate bath, thankfully, and we’re on the case with getting it sorted but for the time being I am considering the inconvenience of only being able to have a shower if I go to the gym an extra incentive to fitness!

Hello all… Just a quick note to let you know that I’m in the process of changing web hosts, and thought I’d take the opportunity to clean the slate a little.

Rather than just port the whole of my old blog over, I’ll be a bit selective so it might take a while for things to reappear, but they will. And I should hopefully have a bit more, er, mental freedom to blog now that I have escaped what, in retrospect, was a rather oppressive environment. We shall see.

I know that some of the not-very-many people that read my blog are horticulturally inclined, so I was wondering… can any of you tell me what the heck the below flower is?

It’s lovely, but I have never seen anything like it before and the lady who bought the flowers can’t remember what the florist said.

And yes, more cut flowers on my last day somewhere They are very pretty, though, and I must say I was very touched with how lovely most of the people in my team were on my last day yesterday (not that they’re not normally, but you know what I mean!). There were other gifts, too, including a rather lovely bamboo needle set - all very thoughtful, and unexpected too

I’ll definitely really miss a lot about that place. It was a strange company, in that it was fairly large and felt at times like there wasn’t much interaction between different departments, but my team was a decent size and composed of some really great people who are really capable of such strong things. There’s a warmth to it, you know? Even if it is perfectly clear that various people within the team are not necessarily happy about The Current Situation…

I actually had an exit interview with an HR bod before I left, which was a first for me. I’d say ‘fair but honest’ describes my contribution. I feel it’s incredibly important to be honest in these things, or else the company stands to gain bugger all from them and might as well not do them at all. There’s no point going for the jugular unnecessarily, though, and although I feel I’ve either been party to or observed some poor management and decisions I don’t get my knickers in a twist over it in the same way that I did earlier in my office career. I just mentally detatch for my own sanity and hatch escape plans instead, if I can’t see a light at the end of the tunnel

Speaking of management, it’s completely possible to be excellent at managing systems and processes and bloody awful at managing people, in my opinion. I think you have to make an effort to understand people to be a good person-manager, and for all the lip service that gets paid I think some people just don’t and so think they are better at the whole managing people malarky than their subordinates think they are. People are motivated in different ways and you’ve got to learn that and work with it.

Put it this way, if someone walks into a one to one with you nervous because they reckon they’ll get a bollocking for something not looking as good as it could do without having the faintest idea of what constitutes ‘as good as it could do’ in your eyes and how to put that into practice, you’re doing it wrong. And if they come out in tears - you’re definitely fucking doing it wrong!

So, I guess at this stage it’s a question of so long and thanks for all the fish to my now ex-colleagues. And good luck!

I must have used that post title umpteen times over several years and two blogs! Still, it seemed rude not to use it since I am once again on the move in a work-related sense.

My current contract was only ever temporary, for a year’s maternity leave cover, and it comes to an end at the end of this month. Originally, my hope was for it to become a permanent role - but the thinking was that if worst came to the worst then it was a year’s good experience on my cv. Permanent, I think, wasn’t to be - bit of a cost-freezing/cutting exercise going on at the moment, so while there was a 3 month extension on offer there was no promise of anything beyond that, so it would have been foolish of me not to keep an eye out for other opportunities.

But it’s more than that. There have been so many shifts and changes over the past year that it feels almost like a different company. An incredibly efficient machine in many ways, but perhaps a less… happy one? One into which I saw myself fitting less easily, anyway, which is a shame because I really do believe in the company and the people within the team. Just my perception, of course, but it meant that in all honesty I was progressing other opportunities with something more than just the anticipated ‘I’m not sure if or for how long my contract will be extended’ feelings. I am on my third boss, and frankly was extremely unhappy with the last change. No offence to said boss, a question of The Way It Was Handled, Role Changes and Respective Levels rather than of personalities.

Happily, however, I have managed to effect an escape. I will work to the end of my original contract, take a week off to catch my breath, and then take up an opportunity about which I’m really excited, working with people with whom I know I can work, doing what I kind of wish I’d been doing all along.

I am happy.

Well, the shawl I started while we were in the Lake District in March got rather put off thanks to the Swallowtail knitalong, but here she be, finished and blocked:

A detail shot, which also gives a better idea of the colour.

Pattern: Diamond Fantasy Shawl, by Sivia Harding

Yarn: Handmaiden Sea Silk, in ‘Paris’

The yarn was an absolute pleasure to knit with - silky soft and with beautiful sheen. The jade areas are wonderfully irridescent, although I think if I buy it again I’ll choose a solid or semi-solid shade to really make the most of it.

The pattern took a bit of getting into, but again was great to see taking shape and makes a really pretty smallish shawl. Very happy with this knit, although I’m buggered if I know what’s driven this sudden interest in shawls!

Thanks to a Ravelry knitalong on the Posh Yarn knitters group, my poor Diamond Fantasy shawl has been languishing a bit these past two weeks. On the other hand, I have made a Swallowtail Shawl:

Needless to say, I’m really pleased with it I’m surprised how quickly this knitted up, too - it’s seemed to fly off the needles of everyone who was knitting it.

Pattern: Swallowtail Shawl, by Evelyn A. Clark, from Interweave Knits Fall 2006 .

Yarn: Eva 2ply in Serenade, from Posh Yarn. One small business that delivers such beautiful products and excellent customer service that I can’t recommend it enough.

This is the first pattern I’ve knitted that I can actually see me making again - it’s just a really satisfying knit. I added a few repeats of the budding lace chart to make for a slightly bigger shawl, so I used about 10g of my second skein of the Eva (I should have about enough of that left to make a lace scarf, I think) - it’s still a rather nice scarf size, though.

Lots of rain lately and now it’s warm and sunny. The tulips are clearly appreciating the weather we’ve been having lately! I’m certainly appreciating the weather this weekend (although it is threatening rain for later on today, despite the lovely morning we’ve had) - although since it’s seemed to be chucking it down every time I’ve been at home and vaguely likely to do some weeding that did mean I had rather a lot to catch up on yesterday. Two hours of it, to be precise, and that’s not even starting on the raised beds! I am now achey. Still, the raised beds won’t take long - just need to be raked over and have some compost thrown on in preparation for those seeds which are hardy enough to brave the randomness that has been April weather so far.

I started lots of veg off indoors last year, but haven’t done so this year, so they will all be taking their chances outside in the not too distant future. Possibly under fleece, depending on whether the weather is going to stay as warm and sunny as it is at the moment (ha!) or whether it’s going to hail on us again! I’m going to hang onto quite a few of the same things I did last year, but also try a couple of things I’ve not grown yet - beetroot, sweetcorn (even though we haven’t got room for a particularly high yield I’m not sure I can resist!) etc.

Strange times lately, about which I can’t really blog too much as some of it is work-related. There have been a lot of changes lately, and I’m not convinced that everyone is too delighted about them. Comes down to whether you believe more in a particular structure or in your existing workforce, who may or may not fit into that structure if that’s not what was in mind when they were employed. Interesting times, again (I should be used to this by now. Really ought to make a start on that best-selling novel, it would solve all of this rearranging that seems to happen on a regular basis when one works for other people!). I’m not too far off the end of my contract, so I’m at Considering My Options time. There are a couple of irons in the fire (well, I’d be bloody stupid not to be keeping an eye out if things are uncertain in my current place of work, wouldn’t I?), so we shall see.

Hee! Look what the lovely Sandykins sent me! This is the first time I’ve taken part in a knittyboard swap, and it’s been great fun. I had a fab time picking out pressies with which to spoil the lovely Yarner, and Sandy’s parcel today is full of fun goodies which made me very happy.

They include:

Trekking Hand Art handpainted yarn in ‘Irland’ - I could see man-socks in this…

Trekking Pro Natura (I’ve enjoyed knitting with this before) in a brightish shade

Some fab grey wool from one of the last woollen mills in Sweden!

A fabulous Felisi bag! Hee, I have a hand-made knitting bag!

Plus some groovy little lettered stitchmarkers and some row markers that Sandy made with her own fair hands, some handy knitting tools, some *gorgeous* chocolate, and a funky Swedish pen and napkins.

And that’s on top of the copy of Cat Bordhi’s ‘New Pathways for Sock Knitters’ which she sent me earlier. I am very lucky.
Thank you so much, Sandy - it’s all really great and completely brightened a rather grey day here in Blighty